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Don’t Say Goodbye to Saying Hello

by Joyce McGreevy on February 5, 2018

A man and a woman conversing in Ireland shows how saying hello is fundamental across cultures. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

Saying hello is saying yes to life.
© Joyce McGreevy

Meeting & Greeting Across Cultures

In a New Yorker cartoon entitled “How to Clear a Space at a Crowded Beach,” a man says hello to all and sundry. His cheeriness so horrifies New Yorkers that hundreds collectively retreat.

Oh, I see: Some people like saying hello. Some people give hello the heave-ho.

In Galway, Ireland, (pop. 258,000) passersby often say hello to one another. Nothing fancy, mind you. A quick tap of the second syllable and you’re on your way. In Istanbul, Turkey (pop. 15 million) a local who said hello to passersby would prompt a puzzled reaction.

Yet people in both cities are notably friendly.

Does higher population density = fewer hellos? In New York City, saying hello to your neighbors in just one square mile would take you 2 weeks, 4 days, and 16 hours.

How Do You Hello?

Every culture has numerous ways to say hello, from Hi to Sula manchwanta galunga omugobe. Some greetings translate as questions: “Where are you going?” (Philippines) “Have you eaten?” (China) “Have you slept well?” (central Africa)

A word cloud in many languages shows that saying hello is fundamental across cultures. (Image © annatodica/iStock)

There’s a world of ways to say hello!
© annatodica/iStock

Business greetings vary across cultures, too. Leaving an office in Europe for one in Southern California, I often encountered hugs instead of handshakes. Yet saying hello to my SoCal neighbors elicited wary looks, as if I might be a time-share vendor eager to make a sale.

In Japanese business settings, hugs are unheard of, handshakes uncommon, and elaborate etiquette governs bowing and the exchange of business cards. But it was Japanese psychology that taught me a simple path to resilience during challenging times: maintain the practice of saying hello.

A Belgian cheesemonger saying hello shows that greeting is fundamental across cultures. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

There’s nothing cheesy about saying hello!
© Joyce McGreevy

In France, entering a shop without saying Bonjour, Madame (or Monsieur) is considered rude. Ditto Merci, au revoir as you leave. France is also where I’ve seen people say hello on entering elevators or when passing in corridors. It’s no come-on, just good manners.

Hello Kissy

Some cultures kiss hello. Career diplomat Andy Scott has navigated greetings in 60 countries, where the proper number of kisses can vary from one (Colombia) to eight (Afghanistan). In One Kiss or Two? The Art and Science of Saying Hello (The Overlook Press, available March 2018) Scott guides readers through greeting etiquette across cultures in all its air-kissing, high-fiving, nose-rubbing, cheek-sniffing, foot-kissing, floor-spitting, tongue-sticking, hand-clapping variety.

Hello, Fellow Human

Hello goes beyond words and gestures. Think of all the times you make eye contact with strangers—approaching the paper-towel dispenser in a restroom, finding a seat at the doctor’s office. Maybe you’ve shared an empathetic grimace with others in line at the DMV, or traded sheepish grins with a fellow shopper as you negotiated a narrow grocery aisle with oversized shopping carts.

What difference can such fleeting contact make?  A lot. In 2011, researchers at Purdue University noted that humans have “evolved systems to detect the slightest cues of inclusion or exclusion. For example, simple eye contact is sufficient to convey inclusion. In contrast, withholding eye contact can signal exclusion” making people feel invisible.

They named their study after a German expression, wie Luft behandeln—“To Be Looked at as Though Air”—and added a telling subtitle: “Civil Attention Matters.”

A waving hand on a winter day shows that saying hello is universal across cultures. (Image © Banepx/iStock)

A warm greeting can make the world of difference.
© Banepx/iStock

Hello, Anyone Here?

Eye contact is in shorter supply these days, as staring at smartphones becomes the default pause filler. And not just among the young.

Many of us clamp on headphones the moment we board trains, planes, and buses. But a 2014 study of Chicago commuters by the University of California Berkeley found that those who engaged another passenger in conversation were much happier.

I’m an irrepressible hello-er. Otherwise, I would have missed a wonderful dinner conversation last night with my friends Ann and Caitlin. After all, a few hours earlier, we hadn’t yet met.

To Greet or Not to Greet

Saying hello connects us, yet saying hello is a risk. We love getting out of the house for the social atmosphere of a café. Then we crouch behind our laptops.

Saying hello breaks down barriers. When a toddler says “Hi” in a public space it sparks friendly exchanges among nearby adults.

A baby waving shows that saying hello is fundamental across cultures. (Image © M-image/iStock)

Even as babies, we instantly process the emotional significance of a wave.
© M-image/iStock

The Power of Saying Hello

Once upon a time, at a college orientation, a young man saw a beautiful fellow student. At a loss for a clever opening line, he opted for “Hello.”

They’re happily married now.

So, don’t say goodbye to saying hello. Greetings vary across cultures, but in every language of the world, saying hello welcomes a world of possibility. Sometimes the sweetest possibility of all.

A couple walking hand in hand in Budapest show the power of saying hello across cultures. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

To say hello is to greet life with open arms.
© Joyce McGreevy

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14 Ways of Learning a Second Language

by Joyce McGreevy on August 8, 2017

A signpost atop Floyen, Bergen in Norway reflects the idea that learning a second language can take you in new directions. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

Learning a language takes you in new directions.
© Joyce McGreevy

Language Tips for Busy People

Research shows that learning a second language is like superfood for the brain. Experts say we’re predisposed to be multilingual. So why do so many smart people think learning a second language is impossible?

Curiously, those who claim linguistic ineptitude often use complex grammar:

  • “Had I understood the benefits of learning Japanese, I would have taken classes.”
  • “If only I could have learned Spanish in high school, I would be fluent today.”

“Oh, I see”: You can learn languages, whatever their complexity, whatever your age, wherever you travel.

A card in London featuring a quotation from Deborah Levy features an inspiring language tip. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

An OIC Moment spotted in a London bookshop.
© Joyce McGreevy

Immerse to Converse?

The ideal way of learning a second language is through immersion. Imagine living among native speakers until, little by little, the unfamiliar language starts making sense. Nearly 5 million kids in the U.S. do this every day. There’s also the “win the lottery, move to Tuscany” school of immersion, but most folks are already immersed in life’s demands.

But suppose you’ve got a vacation coming up. You could stick to English—depend on others to be multilingual—or you could learn at least some of the language.

Here’s how:

1. Practice the Tao of Now. In Peanuts, Snoopy tells Woodstock “I read at least one word a day.” Download an app that will send you “the word of the day” in your chosen language. Poco a poco, le parole diventano frasi.

2. Learn Ps and Qs. Master local versions of please, thank you, and other emblems of respect. Start with the basics, then listen for local variations.

3. Greet the Neighborhood Cats. Too shy to practice new words on people? It’s a little-known fact that cats are multilingual. The next time you meet a friendly feline, greet it in another language. Sure enough, it will demonstrate utter comprehension with an affirming “meow” in the local language. Repeat your greeting until you become comfortable enough to try it out on humans.

A city street in Athens, Greece inspires thoughts of learning a second language. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

Admittedly, some Greek gátes are chattier than others. 
© Joyce McGreevy

 A sleeping cat in Athens, Greece is unlikely to offer language tips on learning a second language. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

But all are purrrfectly non-judgmental!
© Joyce McGreevy

4. Get Practical. Most phrasebooks reflect outdated travel norms. In this digital age, few of us need dialogues for making hotel reservations, let alone asking porters to carry our steamer trunks. To update the phrasebook approach, brainstorm what you personally need to know and research that. For me, that includes requesting photocopying services and scheduling a root touch-up.

5. Act Like a Child. In Valletta, Malta, a bookseller pointed wordlessly at the textbooks for learning Maltese. Then I asked her to recommend kotba tat-tfal (children’s books), gesturing toward myself and grinning sheepishly.  With that, her warm personality surfaced. She not only helped me find a local favorite, but shared a wealth of language tips.

6. Picture the Page. Don’t forget comic books, graphic novels, and magazines. Make your own captioned pictures, too. Visual supports mean you’ll need a dictionary less often.

Magazines in Budapest, Hungary offer enjoyable ways of learning a second language. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

Do bunnies bring baskets of eggs for the Husvéti menü?
© Joyce McGreevy (in Budapest)

7. Cognates to the Rescue. At a Florentine apothecary, a friend of mine mimed washing his hair because he didn’t know the word for shampoo. Turns out it’s il shampoo. Discover the power of cognates.

8. Sing It. Though it’s hardly a marketable skill, I can sing the theme song from “The Flintstones” in Italian. I also know that Albania borders on the Adriatic. Why? Because I heard the information sung. One time. Years ago. If you can say it, sing it, and you’ll save it.

9. Preempt Translation. Think of grocery stores as 3-D picture dictionaries. The great thing about picture dictionaries is that they help you stop translating. Instead of thinking “the word for apple,” you see a red round object and discover that it’s manzana.

10. Catch on with Context Clues. When my friend Julie visits Irish friends, she doesn’t ask for “milk” in her coffee, she asks for bainne. And she doesn’t always have coffee, sometimes she sips a cupán tae. Just don’t drop a mála tae into your cupán and pour boiled uisce over it. The best tae is brewed slowly in a taephota.

Trays of ice cream with flavors labeled in Croatian suggest a tasty way of learning a second language. (Image © Joyce McGreevy)

On a summer day in Zagreb, my favorite Croatian word is sladoled.
© Joyce McGreevy

11. Eat Your Words. If that charming taverna has an English-language menu, chances are it’s limited to bland options. Explore a culture’s culinary language before you ever go abroad, thanks to diverse restaurants and cooking classes in your community. And keep this shortcut handy: Learn expressions equivalent to “favorite local dish” or “something traditional.” What if you have allergies? What if you’re vegan? Download multilingual food-allergy chef alert cards or use a travel app.

12. Repeat, Please. Soap operas are ideal, not only because you get caught up in the conflict, but because they recap plots and repeat expressions. Counter-intuitive language tip: Set subtitles in the same language, not English, and be patient. Once you begin to understand, you’ll retain more of what you learn.

13. Listen in the Laundry. If you do use language audio, include podcasts—many free 5-minute-a-day lessons are surprisingly effective. Put on earphones and turn chore times into learning opportunities.

14, Dare to Air—I Mean, Err. When learning a second language, you’ll make mistakes. But don’t we sometimes make mistakes in our first language? “Oops,” we say, and try again. That’s a good plan for any language.

Discover why being bilingual works wonders for your brain here.  

Access a world of free language-learning resources on Open Culture here.  

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Crossing Cultures with an Urban Eye

by Meredith Mullins on July 31, 2017

View of Hong Kong apartment building by Michael Wolf from his series Life in Cities, images that show the megacity crossing cultures. (Image © Michael Wolf.)

Michael Wolf’s images are a metaphor for megacities.
© Michael Wolf

Michael Wolf’s View of Life in Cities

Human herds. The crush of crowds. Anonymity. Frenetic rhythms. Unrelenting surround-sound. Noise. Congestion. Forced verticality. Pollution.

Density in all its forms.

Much has been written to advocate for, rail against, and, ultimately, to understand life in cities. Images abound. Urban life is not a mystery.

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